WEDDING NOTES™ – Reception Trends

Reflecting both economic issues and generational trends, we are seeing some shifts in the wedding sites being chosen, the foods served and the size of the wedding itself.  We meet with brides who are asking for ideas for their “smaller but tasteful” weddings.

These are some of the key ideas brides are embracing as they plan receptions.

• They are trimming the guest list.  After creating a rough draft of all the possible guests, and multiplying that number by the caterer/reception venue chef’s estimate per person costs, couples are balancing the guest list with their budgets.
• Budget conscious brides are selecting other days and times than Saturday evening.  By selecting a morning or afternoon wedding and reception, there can up to a 25% reduction in reception costs for food and beverages.  If the couple were to select another evening other than Saturday, the savings can be approximately 10%.
• We are also seeing a change in foods served at evening weddings.  We are seeing trends toward smaller portions.  More couples are choosing to serve passed hors d’oeuvres and appetizers instead of a sit down dinner.  Couples are choosing finger foods – foods to eat while walking around and talking. 
• While couples will still have a wedding cake for pictures, it tends to be much smaller than those previously ordered.  In place of the large wedding cake, they are serving cupcakes, cake bites, cake pops on sticks and push cakes – all part of the “finger food” trend.
• In some areas, dessert “stations” remain popular additions to the centerpiece wedding cake.  Brides have chosen cheesecake stations, chocolate stations, pie stations and sundae/frozen yogurt stations that feature mini root beer floats and ice cream sandwiches along with various toppings.

Contact us and talk with one of our experienced consultants who can give you many more ideas to create the wedding that is smaller, more intimate and more reflective of your life style.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Cash Requested?

There are a number of web sites and blogs that have – in effect – approved the request for a cash gift as a “discreet mention” on the wedding invitation.  We can hardly believe that someone who claims to be a wedding professional is offering that kind of advice to brides.  Some do acknowledge that it is difficult to ask for money and that some guests may take offence.  Hello!

Every professional wedding planner or consultant should acknowledge the first rule stated beautifully by Emily Post.  “Some traditions never go out of style.  A few that hold true:  No mention of gifts, even “no gifts, please” is made on a wedding invitation.”  This holds doubly true for cash.  “Sharing information on a wedding website is fine, and that site may offer registry information.”  The guideline is:  Don’t include registry or gift information with your invitation.  It is in poor taste to include a list of places where the bride and groom are registered or a checklist of the things they do and don’t want.  And this guide certainly applies to cash. 

We do acknowledge that outside of the very formal traditional invitation where wording follows a time-honored formula, more couples are choosing new wording options.  The best advice to give brides is that any wording they chose that is both “respectful of their guests and true to themselves will be fine.”  (Emily Post) It is important that invitations read as correct grammatical statements and provide guests with all the information they need about who, when, where and how to reply.

Help your bride to understand that there is no way to dictate to guests what they choose to give. Tell her that if she is asked what she would like by a close relative, it is fine to answer honestly and politely that the couple is saving for a down payment on a house, but that whatever that person chooses will be appreciated.  Rely on parents, friends, and attendants to spread the word that cash gifts are appreciated or have those same people provide the information about where the couple is registered.

For more help with etiquette questions, call us and talk over your issues with one of our experienced consultants.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Cost Savings Ideas

The National Retail Federation commissioned a survey on consumer spending conducted by a major research firm.  There were many economic indicators that tended to vary by product area.  But when asked to summarize the findings, the conclusion was “Spend where you need to, save where you can.”  This is good advice for our brides.  Couples coming to us for ideas on how to save money without hurting their wedding dreams find wonderful and practical ideas.

We always counsel our brides to be aware of ways to either bring costs down or keep them in check.  Done in the right places, there are many ways to save on costs and take nothing away from the wedding they have planned.

Because it is the most costly aspect of most wedding plans, major savings can be realized through reception adjustments.  We recommend that our brides consider these ideas.

• Look for a location that both fits the occasion and requires very little decorating enhancements.  Many spots are fine the way they are.  If brides wish to add décor, most event planners would agree that creating one large decorative element is not only dramatic, but also more budget friendly than a dozen smaller elements scattered around the room.

• When considering decorating options, always picture the room full.  We counsel brides not to spend excess dollars on décor items that only the first few guests walking into the room will see.  Don’t waste money on decorating the skirting of any of the tables for instance.  As one wedding planner says, “Think tabletop and up”.

• During receptions, caterers will say that people tend to take less food if it is passed by the wait staff than if it is placed on a buffet table.  The same is true of champagne or other beverages.  The good news about this is that less food or liquor can be ordered and guests still feel pampered.

• If it is important to the couple to serve a sit down dinner, we suggest that instead of ordering just one high-end entrée they order half portions of two main entrée items.  For example, combining half portions of prime rib and chicken breast, helps to bring down the cost per plate while offering guests a selection with depth.

• One consultant suggests ordering sandwiches for entertainers and servers instead of the full banquet meal, and having them set up in a separate room from wedding guests.  It gives the staff a place to “get away” for a break and provides food that they can “grab and go” if needed.

For more “invisible” ways to manage costs at your reception, talk with one of our experienced consultants.

WEDDING NOTES™ – Bridesmaids

The history of bridesmaids is time and culture dependent.  However, their main charge seems to have been to “protect” the bride, “intervene” on her behalf and/or help outsmart the evil spirits who gathered as a group at weddings and other happy events.

Today’s bridesmaids still fulfill some of those roles, even if the evil spirit happens to a former boyfriend with too much champagne and too little class, or a college roommate who thinks it would be fun to “steal” the bride between the ceremony and the reception.  Bridesmaids can often be the voice of reason when they hear “Let’s ______, it’ll be funny.  You’ll see.”  They can put a stop to nonsense early.

Bridesmaids give up time and money in return for the honor of being witnesses to the bride’s very special day.  We urge our brides to remember the important role they play in her wedding and to pay attention to thanking them for their help and caring.

Here are some tips we have gathered over the years.

• Selecting the bridesmaids’ dresses does not have to be an occasion of conflict.  Cost, style, color and accessories can be issues only if you let them.  If you can help financially, by all means do so.  If your wedding party represents a wide collection of sizes and shapes, work closely with a skilled and experienced wedding consultant who knows the best vendors to chose to work with your wedding.  An experienced retailer will work hard to make sure that the shopping experience is rewarding for all, and will insure that what you have ordered is what you’ll receive.  If the bridal retailer is a member of National Bridal Service, you can relax and know that all will be well.

• Make sure that your bridesmaids are getting enough attention from you.  Keep them in the loop about events and plans.  Accept help if it is offered.

• Make sure they have a clear idea of what to do and what you expect.  Your maid of honor can take on the responsibility of keeping all maids in the loop.  Don’t be too demanding.  Just because your wedding is consuming your every waking moment, bridesmaids do have lives beyond the wedding.

• Be sure to assemble a survival kit for the wedding.  Work with your personal attendant to make sure all necessary items are in the kit and trust her to bring it to the dressing area of the ceremony location, and to reclaim it after the ceremony. A good wedding planner will always take good care of this.

• Make sure to thank bridesmaids often.  Thoughtful gifts are appreciated. 

Take time to ask questions, share concerns and plan ways to make bridesmaids feel truly a part of this very special day.